Or maybe just April Fools…
Aren’t those baby blue’s of Sammy Kat’s gorgeous? Don’t ya feel like you could stare into those eyes and see his soul? We’ve done a lot of soul searching for the Build a Line Challenge Master Class, facilitated by Brenda Sue Landsdowne of BSueBoutiques.com.
At least I have. Many of the subjects covered were expected. Pricing, branding, styles of design.
There were a couple at least that had me tossing and turning way into the middle of the night. I really did not expect that this exercise could have me examining myself. I am grateful for the experience. Brenda is a wonderful instructor. I surely didn’t anticipate gaining such insight to my motivation and discovering what I really want to do with my work.
The first blog was reasonably easy. I had mine completed days earlier than the deadline as I was going to visit my sister. With out computer access for 10 days, I knew I had to have everything ready before leaving.
For the second blog I managed to bring it in just in time! Oh was I really dreading the hop on that one…We have some amazingly talented writers in this group. This created a major challenge for me. I really felt pressure to “measure” up. It is totally a self inflicted condition. No one makes me feel as though I am not good enough.. I do it to myself.
And here now.. the 11th hour before this blog is published and I am fighting tears and panic attacks. Ugh.. There is nothing so hard required, nothing I haven’t done before. The panic.. the emptiness where thoughts and ideas should be is not new for me. A kind of performance anxiety. And now just admitting the problem is making me feel so much better.
The first topic that really gave me pause to think was the question: Hobbyist, Maker or Designer. I know what I wanted the answer to be. I also knew that by not being honest with myself I was never going to grow.
I am a Hobbyist.
I do not enjoy production, making duplicates. I cannot do custom orders or special requests. I block up, waste time and dawdle until the deadline. Mostly it causes me discomfort. I have come to realize I love this process of makering too much to allow it to make me uncomfortable. I have to find within myself a happy medium.
The next module that made me sit up and think was the one labeled Getting in the way of your own productivity. Was that written just for me, or what! I can find a million and 1 ways to waste time. Yanno how a little kid pushes the food around on his plate when he really isn’t eating it? .. Yeah… my signature move. I start moving brass all around the table.. back into it’s storage box and out again. if there is pressure!! When I am makering just for the fun of it with no deadline, no comparison to anyone elses creations or just cause.. I can sit an create for hours. The module on business plans that followed was particularly meaningful. Realistic goals. You cant get there if you dont know where you are going.
I did not complete 5 pieces of Jewelry to finish the Challenge. I know I am not eligible for any consideration of prizes. But I am a winner. This wonderful class has set the seeds for me to know what it will take to put my dreams of a successful business into action. A plan. Creating my brand. How styles and trends effect fashion accessories. Oh so many things I didn’t know I didn’t know!!
I did succeed in a personal goal. I learned, by finding a gladness in every circumstance I have the power to become more content in my life. This Straw Bonnet attitude has made me more optimistic in general. I smile more, frown less.
I am so very glad I discovered I don’t want to ever stop loving sitting at my workbench and “puttering around”. One day I will come to terms with sharing my work with the group. When this becomes stressful or uncomfortable it is time to walk away.
And now that the pressure is off.. I will skip back to my little corner and maker again. I will probably finish (or start) my Straw Bonnet collection. It still makes me smile.
Thank you to Brenda Sue Landsdowne, and the judges for all your hard work. I appreciate everything you have done for us. Thank you also to the class participants, and to the blog readers. Please… continue on down and see the reveals of my class mates lines..